It’s been a while since I’ve posted. I’ve been really busy lately. The hurricane threw me off. Two weeks without power is hard. It felt like about a year or two. There were days that I did absolutely nothing but sat on my porch and stared for hours, thinking about things, contemplating. I’m glad it’s over and everything is almost back to normal. I have been praying a lot lately, more than I used to. I am trying to discontinue my use of profanity, although it is tough sometimes. I know God has used me in the last two months and I think He has a lot planned for me in my future. I feel I lost a friend over one particular ordeal, but sacrifices sometimes have to be made. The details of the situation are irrelevant, but just to me, it meant a lot. It showed me that God is willing to work with anyone in any situation, no matter what. That really is an encouraging thought.

Other than that, not too much has been happening. I hate how people come and go, and one day you think they are your friend but the next they have nothing to do with you. Sometimes it’s almost like you are being used. It doesn’t really matter though; it will all even out in the end.

I am still contemplating on whether I have free will or not. I am so inclined to believe Determinism, but I just don’t know. Determinism is basically a theory that states that everything you do depends on what you did in the past, which to an extent it does. I am writing this blog right now, why? Because I started a blog back in November of last year. I am writing to contribute to it, therefore I didn’t really choose to write today. Don’t get me wrong, I’m choosing to write what I write, but when it boils down to it, I’m doing it because of something I’ve done in my past. You could say, then why did you start a blog? Well I thought it was a cool idea, therefore I didn’t really choose to do it, and I just did it because I was destined to. I don’t know what to believe anymore.

“We are shaped by fate just as we shape it,” Yeah that’s a quote I use a LOT. But it makes so much sense if you think about it. Let’s analyze that statement a little more:

The first part “We are shaped by fate,” means that we are being shaped by others reactions to events, by others actions. We are being shaped by events every single day. The things we do rely on what has happened to us in the past. We feel that we know more because of experiences we have had. In essence this whole quote refers to the “butterfly effect” in our lives. I’m not referring to the movie, although it is an awesome film; I’m referring to the effect that every single thing, no matter how small or how large, has on our lives. If you’re wondering, the “butterfly effect,” is a theory and it states the following: A single flap of a single seagull’s wings would be enough to change the course of all future weather systems on the earth. Well it really applies to more than just weather systems and so on; it applies to our life so much.

Now let’s take a look at the second part: “Just as we shape it,” Wow isn’t that really an awesome thought? We shape fate as well, we shape others actions, and others intentions, thoughts, and their life overall. And no, this doesn’t depend on the amount of influence you have on people. Every single person in the world plays a part somehow. Imagine you have a friend. Let’s just say they are having a pretty bad day. Well let’s also say that you don’t talk to them about it, and neglect it, because you’re in a bit of a bad mood yourself. Well imagine if you talking to that person could have completely changed their mood. Imagine if they were considering suicide, and killed him? It wouldn’t be your fault, but imagine what would change if you would have talked to them about it? Their suicide would cause a series of events; it could cause that person’s parents to start drinking or smoking, or something like that, or even kill themselves. So that one small event could change the course of history. It’s really something deep to consider.

Now that comes to the question, should you analyze every single event that comes up? Nope, just live. Do your best to make good decisions, but you can’t overanalyze events that come up in your life. You can’t say why did that happen how it did? Sure it’s great to think about, but you can’t change it. What you’ve done shaped who you are, that’s your “butterfly effect”

Always consider possibilities in situations. Stick with your original plans, but you always have to say, what if it were different? Think back about just one thing and alter that situation, and consider what all it would change. That’s the butterfly effect. That’s why you are here, because of that. I love thinking about that. I love to think, what if I’d have done that differently, would I still be alive? It’s definitely an interesting thought.

Why do we hold on to the past? Why do we dwell on things that are over, or things that should be over? We hold on to those things that aren’t necessarily good for us because we think that we’ve invested to much time into them to give up on them. We feel that we put to much time in them to totally drop them from our lives, although they may be harming us. This goes for relationships, as well as many other aspects of our life. No matter how far down the road you go, no matter how deep into something you have traveled, it is never ever to late to turn back. Many people don’t realize this; in my opinion that is imperative to remember.

Why must we go day by day wondering what is going to happen. And wondering, “How’s it going to end?” Why? Why can’t we know? That’s a foolish question I know but I really wish sometimes I did know. Although, if I knew my future, how could I ensure that it would turn out the same. Because wouldn’t viewing your future change your actions? That’s an interesting thought. It amazes me how people change over time. Not only over a long period of time, but even short periods sometimes. How can a person completely change in a matter of days?